New Life

It’s March and as it is said that with March the spring begins, new life is created in nature as well as with us human.

Right now I’m in the hospital welcoming a newborn baby to this world.
Again it is fascinating and always a blessed wonder to see what God has created in us. Thinking about situations in the past with befriended couples trying to receive a baby, to become pregnant using all human medicine and hospitals can offer to help with, spending 2 years or more of their time and life and not to forget the expenses you are willing to pay, because your biggest wish is to become pregnant to your own baby.
With this befriended couple, which tried for several years using the best human medicine and help that they could get, still they didn’t received what they wished for. When they decided to finally put a break on this tiring journey and went for holidays, finally they became pregnant and all without any medication or hormones or other help.
God is great, if God wants you to become pregnant he will give you a baby even if it is impossible for the human medicine, even if it seems to be impossible because of age or other circumstances.

Today the daily bible verse is
Hebrew 11:6

„And without trusting, it is impossible to be well pleasing to God, because whoever approaches him must trust that he does exist and that he becomes a Rewarder to those who seek him out.“
‭‭Messianic Jews (Heb)‬ ‭11:6‬ ‭CJB‬‬

People tend to forget how many miracles happen in their life’s and if they recognize it’s something unspecified or some high power; even for some Christians they don’t remember God, who truly never forgets his children.
Sometimes, when I watch these sort of scenes from outside I have this picture inside my head =
A mother and/or father loves their child with all their heart. You would never wish anything bad, or would like to see your child being hurt or injured.
As a loving parent you try to be a good parent providing everything your child needs, food, health and love to fill their heart and your relationship between each other. And even if you are not around your child you still think about everything and wish the best and if needed you will be there for your child, no matter what.

I experience exactly this with my heavenly father. Sure my family on this earth is there for me too, loving me, caring, but there is no one like my heavenly father, always waiting there for me, with open arms, wanting to keep away everything and everyone who will do me harm.
You may ask “why are bad things happen then?” if you are a parent, I can ask a question as well “did your child ever fell? Hurt his/her knee or arm or any part of its body?” in this situation, what did you do to prevent all these bad things to happen to your precious child? And in general you just have one at the same age (sometimes twins, sometimes triplets…) why didn’t you take more care? Please don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to say a parent who’s not guarding their child 24/7 every single second in life is a bad one, as a mother of beautiful blessed children I can tell, that sometimes it’s not possible to prevent things to happen – but something good will come out – in German we call it “Lern-Effekt” guess it’s quite similar in English as an learning-process. So if my child is running and not really taking care where he’s running and how fast, he might fall down. I already tried to warn him, telling him to not run too fast and always keep looking where he’s running to. Still there are situations where kids fall – and then? As a mother I run to my child, carry him, caring about him and trying to ease the pain with my love.
So is our heavenly father – but he is much more! Because our heavenly father IS Love – he is even more caring about us, he wants us to be healthy, active, full of joy and full of love, because he is Love.
And he is there for us when we fall, the point is, because we can’t see him face to face (read the story of Adam and Eve) it is sort of difficult for many to ask him for help. To reach out our hands to him, when we’ve been the wrong road for some time, when we took the wrong exit or when we need his guidance.
It was the same with me in my past, I was rather running to friends, calling them and asked their opinion or even wanted a direction where to go, instead of talking to my heavenly father first.
It’s like your child tries to find its way out to a place where he belongs and he’s not asking you, instead he’s asking another baby with no clue at all.
Again, I’m not telling that we are all baby’s not knowing anything – but for me, the fact is – God knows everything, he knows me better than anyone, because he knows the real me, every hidden spot inside me and sometimes I can tell he knows me better than I do myself.

Lately, when I’m thinking about my sick cousin (she got cancer), I got sad, and I ask myself why people don’t want to try something so simple, yet so powerful. It’s not expensive, it’s nothing complicated or need a higher education, studies or else, it is just a willing heart to let Jesus enter and receive the full Love of our heavenly Abba. May it take 10 minutes if you do confess yourself to Jesus at home, honestly it’s nothing if you compare it to all the unnecessary stuff you do every day, is it?
And I will be honest with you, the part of family telling to be christian (but plainly on paper) seems to be even more complicated to try accepting and letting Jesus enter their heart, as if it would mean they’ll leave everything, or it means extra hard work or something they never can achieve, while for real everything is already done, Jesus died for you – because of Love.

Yesterday I talked to one of my aunt and while she used to be pushed mentally into a corner, placed to be not well educated, slow minded and well some other negative thinking, I always wished for her to be free with and in Jesus Christ. I had a good talk to her and started to introduce her to Jesus, when she started to tell me, that she wants to read God’s word, but it seems difficult for her because of this and that. I gave her solutions, she can download the bible app and can even listen to it, she doesn’t have to read it herself. She was so happy about this information and told me, that she will download it asap. This is just a small step to bring someone back home to the front door. She will knock by herself and because our loving father will always open the door for a seeking heart of his child, she will receive his never ending love, and because I’m his daughter and I know his truth I will support her with every question and challenges.

Sometimes we think Life is complicated, complex and difficult, while in fact together with God, who creates everything it is simple, it is good and holy.




The Difficulties I experienced and still experience wearing a headcover – no matter if it’s my Tichel or a Hijab or Veil is still in the air.

Even posting pictures on Instagram (@Sarah_Jesus_Headcover) creates questions, questionmarks inside some heads and well sometimes misunderstanding. But I really appreciate all my followers and followers-to-be who simply write a message or post a comment below and ask whatever is on their mind.
Sometimes it’s even easier to talk to others on these online platforms as in real life.
Why is that? Well let me explain, in real daily life, walking with a tichel or any kind of headcover as a Christian creates these questionmarks on people’s face. I can’t even tell why, but I experienced that sometimes people want to ask, and sometimes they don’t. If they don’t, they’d like to keep their own explanation, even if they are totally “wrong” or “misled”. While on others it’s like this disgusting look, because I stopped wearing my tichel the second half of 2017 and started again in 2018. And it feels like a facial expression telling me “come on, you’ve already had this period and let’s call it phase of your life, than finally you stopped and got back to normal and now again? Why’s that, I hoped and wished that you’ve passed it now and forever”… this is a lot, for just an expression – but well, I don’t know why, but too often it’s that I’m right about such things. It’s like a “feeling” or something like this.

Last time I had a good talk to my sister, while I don’t know if she understood what I tried to explain to her or not, because as I know myself years ago I was similar, thinking “why should God want us to cover our hair? He created us like this” yes, totally right, it has nothing to do with our naturally appearance but more about obedience for our heavenly father Adonai. Our culture, the media and well social acceptance created a point of view in my sight that kept telling me to take my right as a woman wearing what I want, if I want to be sexy I wear even less clothes, because I can. Well, yes because I can, doesn’t mean it’s the right way.

“Submit as people who are free, but not letting your freedom serve as an excuse for evil; rather, submit as God’s slaves. Be respectful to all — keep loving the brotherhood, fearing God and honoring the emperor.”
1 Pe 2:16‭-‬17 CJB

The most experience while wearing my tichel is a surprised facial expression and sometimes question about my believe, if I converted, if I’m Muslim, if I changed something important in my life – and if so what exactly?! Some asked, if I cover because of sickness, if I lost my hair and cover because of cancer or leukemia.
And still, on Instagram I’m asked if I’m Muslim even I’m posting christian and biblical quotes – I’m not offended or anything at all, it’s always a pleasure to get in touch and in good talk to people interested in “why I cover”. When I started last year it was a challenge for myself, but also a way to let others know and inform why others cover and the most important thing to stop a limited mind thinking about headcover is for muslimas only.
It is still a way to go and not as easy as it could be, because the first impression is still something different. But as long as people ask and show interest, there is hope to spread truth.

When I met Jesus and when he took place in my heart, I wanted to know him more, become more like him, like my heavenly father sees me, he has created me as a whole, perfect person and I want to show this, and thank him by gifting him my whole life and everything I am and everything I do.

I can pray in my home, in my room; same as praying in my church community – but I also pray and talk to God while I’m outside, walking in the park or forest.
Last year I read a bit of “stop being a people-pleaser” by Joyce Meyer and this is what I still try to practice in full. Sometimes it is easy, sometimes it is a bit more difficult.
Especially right now in the cold winter season, I’m wearing normal hats/beanies besides my tichel headcovering.

Well, well.. I will keep you updated with my headcover post and the year 2018!

Be blessed!

Not enough hours

I was thinking about this next blog post.
The day is already done, and I’m preparing for bed, as I need some rest – at least 7 hours to keep going.
Sometimes I think I’ve too many schedules and plans a day, but then again it makes me feel whole.

So what is it, that I do? Besides writing as a new blogger, I crochet baby blankets, I read different books about faith, believe, God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit, I do bible studies, I’m still de cluttering my everything, still planing and working on being more and more minimalist, I want to create my own war binder/bullet journal/travellers journal, I enjoy Hillsong, I spend time with my family and I practice writing. It’s actually not that much, while I’m counting them here, while during the day it’s time consuming. So I can’t do everything everyday, I need to put them into a schedule, this is really difficult, as I want to have enough free-time for my family and kids.

I try to combine different things to save time, like crocheting while listening to the bible app or my latest audiobook “Eve” by Paul William Young.
Like right now I’m listening to my daily bible plan while writing this post. It’s training my brain to work and listen to God’s Word.

While it is still unorganized in my daily life I know where I have to put my faith and trust, you know I tried to arrange and plan everything myself, but never involved my heavenly father.
I have to remind myself every day, to put God first in every situation, I want to walk with him everywhere he wants me to be. And this is, why I know that he will help me, arrange my daily routine and schedule; he will show me and let me know, what might be not necessary and what is important for him, so I can check and change to start focusing on these things.

When I started my healthy eating and cleaning-household plan I realized, what God wants in my life. He doesn’t want to restrict my life with rules, but with this plans I can see, that he wants the good for me, my body and my life. Same with my minimalism challenge and my new plank-challenge (I just started 4 days ago). Living with less let me see and value things I own more, it’s reducing waste and well who knows, maybe I can reach a no-waste-Sarah this year?! Guess I will start crocheting some tote-bags. And I started a 30-day plank challenge, because I want to do something for my body with a bit of exercise. I do some extra exercise for my back as well.

Guess plans and challenges are the perfect thing for me. It’s not for everyone, but yes I can tell you, it’s 100% right for me.

Blessings to you!

Small things

It’s Valentines day, the weather is so beautiful, while its still really cold outside, the sun is shining.
The days become longer again and so you feel the energy returning too.

While I had some plans ongoing the last couple of weeks and months today is a day with just a cleaning/household plan.
After I finished “the purpose-driven life” I thought about starting another reading plan but guess I need a break of a couple of days maybe.

I finished some beautiful blankets and also gifted 3 of them to new mama’s and their baby’s. And I’m still creating new ones for sale.

I’m still planing on having my own war binder/blog binder but haven’t found the perfect leather outlet for my inlays.
Found so many beautiful videos on youtube about it!

Ha, and the de-cluttering session is not finished yet, last time I just sorted out everything in my closet. And felt relieved already, so yesterday I tried to sort out everything unnecessary and put it in boxes =
Selling, donating and to throw away.

Honestly, first I thought it’s a month challenge – now I know it’s a lifetime challenge… especially with kids, maybe it’s easier as a single person, but maybe not… until I’m done – I continue crocheting blankets, blankets, blankets… haha…

Hum, this is it for today, sure there is more upcoming.
Be blessed

Christian Head-Covering Tag

It is time to start this blog post, to let you know some more facts and to let you know more about my ways wearing a headcover as a Jesus following christian.

A dear blog follower introduced me to this christian head covering tag and I think it is really a good idea to write down some facts about me and my story on wearing a headcover a jewish tichel.

• How old are you?
I’m 33 years old.

• For how long are you covering?
I started covering last year, 2017 in spring, after I donated my hair.

• How do you cover?
I cover all of my hair; after I tried to cover parts of my hair, like some leaving a fringe, but with my head and hair it didn’t work.
After I started covering my head I started thinking and wearing more modest clothes. I cover my legs and I sorted out tops, shirts and sweater showing too much of chest and chestbones.

• Why do you cover?
I’m born into a protestant christian family, no one is wearing a headcover, whether in church, nor outside.
As a half Indonesian with many visits in this beautiful country I got in contact with hijab wearing women, as Indonesia is the biggest country with Muslim people, 88% of the Indonesians are Muslim (about 191 Mio.people).

Some years ago I started to question myself why some women cover, and the first impression and thought was because of a rule, or a husband, a tradition or a country who tells women to do so. I did some research about the different ways and styles of headcover and their different expression and intention, I began to pray and asked God about my way, my purpose and what I still need to know about headcovering.

I read 1 Cor 11
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is the Messiah, and the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of the Messiah is God. Every man who prays or prophesies wearing something down over his head brings shame to his head, but every woman who prays or prophesies with her head unveiled brings shame to her head — there is no difference between her and a woman who has had her head shaved. For if a woman is not veiled, let her also have her hair cut short; but if it is shameful for a woman to wear her hair cut short or to have her head shaved, then let her be veiled.
1 Co 11:3‭-‬6 CJB

And I started to re-think about the way the western woman is clothing herself and why we think it is a freedom and gift to wear less clothes as a woman. I took a deeper look at the social advertisement, the media and the education.
It is said that women shouldn’t be bound to her wearing, her clothes and her appearance – I think this is correct, but when you start changing the point of view into a neutral point, where you start seeing yourself as a perfect creation God has made, it is a fast way to a more modest way of clothing and behavior.
For me it got clearer every day, as my mind knew, I don’t have to show more flesh and body parts of myself to the world just to be accepted, to be recognized, to be someone.
I just want to be me, the “me” God has created in my mother’s womb 33 years ago.
As a sign of honor and reverence I started covering my hair during prayer at home, which quickly extended, as I questioned myself, what I should do outside, while I’m at the mall, or grocery or at the zoo or elsewhere when I am praying unplanned.
This is how and why I started covering in the first place.

• Do you cover for the same reason now and in the beginning?
The reason I covered in the beginning is still the same now, while today I have to answer even more questions about covering than before. I moved 6 months ago and while moving I didn’t cover my head and now I started again.

•In front of whom do you stay covered? Are there exceptions (family gatherings, working place..)?
At the moment I cover my head in church and on some activities of the kids. I don’t wear my headcover at home or while family gatherings, usually I take off my headcover while visiting female friends and wrap my “tichel” back on when going home.

• What was the reaction of your husband? Of other family members? Of persons you meet?
The reactions were differently, my sisters reacted distant, so did my mother, while my father knows that biblically and in old traditionally christian communities it is nothing new or uncommon to see head covered women in church.
The other family members didn’t asked much, I don’t know if this was because of no interest or fear to ask an embarrassing question.
When I first cover, I met many people outside guessing I’m Arab and Muslim, while I think my appearance is clearly Asian, I could friendly tell that I’m German, while half Asian and no, I’m not a muslima but Jesus following Christian.
For some the next question was, why I cover then, if it is normal for a Christian or not and as soon as we got in a conversation it was a positive exchange of this topic “head cover”.

• How did covering change your life? (prayer, self-esteem, testifying…)
The cover was a shield, like a helmet and a crown. I decided to cover for God, not because my husband has told me, or my father or my church community, but because my heart told me to listen to my heavenly father and obey his rules, and not to look to other people’s opinions, or

• your denomination?
I am following Jesus Christ, the living Word of God, ADONAI my heavenly father and his Ruach HaKodesh – Holy Spirit – christian.

I thank you for reading my new blogpost, please leave a comment below. Be blessed! Shalom

It’s a cold friday

It’s freezing outside, everything is sleeping under an icy blanket of frost.
And I start thinking on how to cloth myself to go outside, walking the dog and enjoying some nice walks through parks and the forest.

First of all I need a big, cozy and of course warm scarf to keep my throat and neck away from the icy wind. Then I put on some selfmade crocheted gloves the fingerless ones. They are really nice, keeping your hands warm (well still the fingers are freezing, but you can use the phone if needed outside) and what about my head? Of course some kind of headcover, a beanie, knitted, crocheted or bought one or my Tichel with thicker scarf to keep my head warm and the headache away.

With all its beauty and the fresh air I’m thanking the Lord that he has blessed me with good health, enough clothes and a warm home – while others don’t, depending on financial circumstances, or after coming as a refugee or homeless.
To be honest, the homeless in Germany sometimes chose to stay outside instead of staying at a save and warm place.
Years ago I questioned myself why there are homeless in Germany, while we have a good working system leaving no one on the street if not wanted.
Even I heard that someone wanted to give a homeless food while instead he wanted money and rejected taking the food because he wanted to buy something strong to drink to keep warm and stay outside.
And even if someone wants to stay outside, being not in the system at all there are some possibilities to sleep in a warm place at least.
There are different possibilities, they have new buildings especially for women, they have busses for homeless to sleep in and other places. I think, it is important to let homeless people know, that there is a possibility to stay warm, at least at night, where it’s freezing and reaching temperatures below 0 degree and more.

Nowadays it is easier to help refugees, especially with kids clothes, blankets or other things needed. It is a simple step to check on communities, the church, the citizen office and/or at the mayor.

While I declutter my closet (again this year 2018) I checked on all clothes still usable and clean to donate, because honestly even I, owning not as much as others, have more than enough.
I can tell, I’m so blessed because of my church family, my family, my friends that I have more than enough and I’m so happy to help others.
After I watched “the minimalist” on Netflix the other day I realized that I can donate even more clothes out of my closet. I liked the part where they showed women trying plan 333 – where you chose out 33 items, clothes, tops, pants, pullover, sweater, skirt, jewlery etc. And use them for 3 months. Sure first you check if everything fits and is easily to be combined with each other and the most important thing – it’s the cloth you really love and usually wear.

I realized that this thinking is right, as I can see with my kids, who already chose what to wear them self. They love some of their clothes and it’s somehow easy to sort out.

With that I donated some clothes and my closet is still not empty at all. I’m happy I declutter but I will continue in 3 months, after I’ve finished the other rooms. It’s like going in circles but after sorting out I also try and watch me buying carefully and thoughtfully.

Also after having this idea of living a minimalists life I loved the idea of a van with possibility to live in. Still a dream but who knows, one day I’m ready for this step.

Be blessed!

While driving the car

Recently it happens often, that while driving the car I have some sorts of flash-backs to my past life.
What exactly? Mostly my past without Jesus, walking in my own way and trying to reach all the goals human might try to reach.

Going back to my early 20’s I remember my rebellious time. I thought about my time being single, singer in a band, student at uni, working part-time as a cashier and as a babysitter, to afford my apartment and my car.

In this time one of my band member was taking us all out for dinner after every band meeting, and this was at least twice a week. We’ve been to different kinds of restaurants like Italian, Greek, Chinese, Japanese and other.
While the band member took us all in his tiny car, he even invited the girlfriends of the drummer and the guitar player. So in his car that fits 5 people he put 6 or 7 at some time.
And for some reason he always needed to show off how fast and dangerous he was driving, once he even took the police attention and just drove even faster to escape an interview and of course the penalty.

This band member also had a strange hobby, he was doing some sort of horoscope and fortune-stuff using special cards Tarot – he was gifted by his grandmother, he told.
So these cards were mixed, then he asked me to chose some, depending on what exactly I wanted to know about my future and for what time-period.
We played this tarot-card game some time and well in my rebellious and naive time I took the chance and believed it.
I thought I’m smart telling myself, that I want to check on the truth first, whether everything he told me will come true or not.
And it did. Everything he told me, about the men I meet and some situations in this period of time happened.
So I asked him to check on my cards again and on my future, asking his cards and the universe.

Again everything happened, and even more.
At first I didn’t recognize it, but after some days I had a real strange feeling, something bad, horrible I couldn’t tell.
I felt something strange following me like a shadow, mostly at night time. The worst thing was, this negative, strange, horrible, cold feeling and thing didn’t disappear… it was like something horrible following you, giving you goose bumps and this cold sweat.. and in the dark, lonely times just before sleep I felt a strong grip pulling you into darkness.

When it got really worse for me, I searched for answers. I tried to re-think and find a solution and an escape out of this horrible situation I’ve already been into.

And I found one. I found the only way out of darkness – Light. And this Light was brought down to us, also named the Way or the living Word – Jesus, Immanuel!
So I began to pray, I searched my heart and begged for forgiveness, because I choose the fortune-telling-cards before God, in other words I created a God for myself and I disobeyed Adonai.
I knew inside my spirit, what exactly was following me, because I did this cruel and disgusting thing in my past called card-fortune (but even a personal horoscope or other fortune telling – it’s all the same).
All for once I knew, why and from whom the fortune, their cards and horoscope receive their power to actually tell the future.

And I even found a passage in the bible, about fortune, people who can get in contact with the dead and other.

I prayed to my heavenly father, I asked for forgiveness and promised him to never put someone or something before him! I fulfilled my promise with horoscope and fortune, while once I broke the part with the partner, but as a daughter of the highest, he called me and always kept me in his secure hands.

This Tarot-Experience was 10 years ago now, I don’t know why I have these flashbacks these days, especially while I’m driving on the Highway.

Since then I even haven’t been interested in reading these small horoscope articles on newspapers. The only thing that occurred the last years was the Chinese horoscope at the end of the year, while eating at a Chinese restaurant with a brother from Church and before leaving they hand us a new Chinese calendar with the Chinese zodiac sign.

Some even say that because of their zodiac their character is fixed.
Honestly I usually can’t remember my children’s zodiac, while the Chinese is still in my head.
I try and want to leave it out as well, as it is not important to me at all.

Years later, after I did this Card-Fortune I listened to a lecture related to God’s living Word the Bible, explaining and revealing what comes as an extra, while ordering your personal horoscope or fortune or Tarot. And this really kicked me back to my past and like the smallest piece of a puzzle everything fit and I received a whole picture of what exactly happened back then.

I thank my heavenly father, my creator and my brother Jesus, Lord of my everything and savior of my soul for revealing so much truth in my life and I thank the Holy Spirit – Ruach HaKodesh for opening my eyes and teaching me so many lessons step by step.

With this I wish you a blessed day!
Thanks for reading!