Hair, Haircut and else

So, talking about Hair and Hairstyle. Lately I was wearing a headcover – Tichel and well not really point to think about my haircut.

So after I moved back I just left my hair and my life be as God wanted me to be. I had long beautiful hair and loved it, as God has gifted me. When I started to think about covering my hair – see my blog post here.
Covering my hair was connected to different thoughts and different situations in my past. Once one friend told me that I would’ve been under man’s hand and control, and the other I was in a relation with a Muslim man – while then I was in no one’s relation or control but I decided to cover my hair… while living in an area with different believes and spirits I prefer to cover my hair and head. Nowadays I like to check on informations about christian head covers, on the real origin ways and clothing of Jesus followers.
Well, the most results are arabic and Muslim hijab. Is it non christian to feel related to the modest look? Is it non christian to feel related to hijab and it’s modest style? Why do I feel related to the modest fashion and the so beautiful hijab style? The world sees hijab and the arabic world with one feeling – fear – why? You should ask yourself why?
Nowadays the urge, the feeling and the love to the native me is more real than before. I can tell you, before it was full of fear how the world, my surroundings could act, could see me, judge me and then? I don’t know, it’s still in process.

How to change the mind of many? How to change the minds of people around you, neighbors and family, friends and? Well, wearing a headcover as a non-muslim means explaining a lot and answering too many questions. Also it’s the questions on what style to wear, the stylish nowadays Tichel or hijabs? I don’t know why I feel related to the classic hijab. One day I will do the test about jewish origin and of course I will let you know.

So what does attract me about the hijab? The style, the look, the modest way to cloth a woman? What is a woman’s worth and purpose?
Is it okay what is normal these days? Is it God’s will to continue like this?
I will let you know about my further life steps… I’m still unsure, I liked to wear my headcover, and now I love to watch and see strong headcover-wearing women, while I walk uncovered these days…

Be blessed dear brothers and sisters!


How the weather changes us (the result of our behavior)

I’ve been waiting for today for some weeks now. I had my appointment at my favorite hairdresser changed three times, to this date – today. I was looking forward, sitting at the hairdresser’s chair, chit-chat with him about past and present, while enjoying this special treat just for me. Last time I went to my hairdresser was March 2016 – so more than a year ago!

My hair had grown a bit already and it wasn’t bad or not pretty but I was looking for something else, fresh, maybe with new color.. I saw my favorite series “Baby Daddy” with #ChelseaKane and I really like her hairstyle, so I send a picture of her haircut to my hairstylist and added my wish of trying out some colors as well..
Today the sun was shining a lot and gave us around 32 degree – so real summer feeling yay!

After cutting and coloring I was done (3 hours later), but somehow my color doesn’t shine through as I wanted and as my hairdresser intended..

All in all its a good nice haircut, but maybe I will stay patient and will keep growing it.. enough haircuts and experiments?.. I will see what will happen the next month’s.. in any way I got my tichel to cover up my head and hair, and where I can experiment with nice scarves.

Going back to my main Topic, about nature and human behavior. Yesterday I had my experience shared with you already and today? What was happening, I was driving the car with my children. The youngest was sleeping and not witnessing the scene that was happening on the highway. After a construction area where the speed limit is 80km/h they had the unlimited speed area with 3 lines. I was going 100km/h on the middle line, overtaking all the trucks but still taking care of the road while it started raining like waterfalls, when I saw this black car speeding behind me, showing his lights in a real aggressive way – still I didn’t thought of anything bad, I was thinking that maybe the driver wants to make me aware about a light or something else my car is having problems with. Still going 100km/h on the middle lane to overtake the trucks on my right side the black car slipped right when there was a gasp and tried to overtake me from the right side (this is not allowed in Germany) and this time I finally saw that this man was mad about me, driving too slow – for him. By any situation he was really angry and upset with me, that I was not driving as he wished I should. Just a little reminder, he simply could have overtake me from my left side, where cars should or are supposed to overtake those cars going 100km/h – but he didn’t, until then he was so mad at me because of nothing, he overtook me then just to place his car in front of mine to go on his breaks for letting me nearly crush his car!
He made me feel so many feelings at the same time, anger, fear, boiling blood and sadness.. why sadness? Because later I could feel sadness for him, because I saw that the devil was torturing him, that he was rushing like the Devils are behind him and I was stopping him to get by, while he didn’t saw his possibilities (on my left side).. I felt weak, because what to do or how to talk to someone while driving 100km/h and more? You can’t hear a word you just see expressions and gestures…
And of course I felt my boiling and rushing blood, this feeling because someone just thinking about himself, not taking care or a thought about others, he saw my kids!! And with this in mind I was really exploding, not understanding what is going on in his head?
My whole body was shaking when I tried to control my car while pushing the breaks so I won’t hit his car while he was pushing his break hard at 100km/h.
When he finally left the scene and headed out the highway he just showed me the “sign of the horns” or “Mano Cornuta”.
As some scene’s of Rock or Metal Music are showing, I realized what it actually meant. Who was actually trying to break me, to make me fear.
The devil will not win or fear me, because I have Jesus! And Jesus already won when the devil tested and tried to trick Jesus, but Jesus is Lord and the devil has to flee!!

This situation showed me, that it is important to know Jesus, to know who is the father, the son and the holy spirit, because truth will win always.
This horrible scenario today showed me what I have to teach my children, what role I have to show them and what important words to speak!
My son was in shock and asked “why this man wants to kill us?” then even he saw his hand gesture.

The world is changing, it was years ago and it is and will in the future, but we all need to be aware and awake to see and choose between light and darkness. And darkness hates light!

I thank God with all my heart, that he had and has his protective hand above me and my family, that I will not receive any harm! I take Jesus Hand every day, and invite his Holy Spirit to guide and lead my way and steps every day!!

Dear brothers and sisters, thank you for taking your time, reading my story!
Be blessed! Shalom

Head covering 

I want to tell you, why I started covering my hair as a Christian.

It wasn’t a decision made in about a few days or some weeks, actually I thought about covering my hair a long time ago. Fear and a fearful voice in my head made me think in negative ways about covering my hair. 

The main thoughts were = covering your head/hair leads to impressions that I converted to another religious believe as to Islam or Sikh, or that I have a hairloss sickness or else? To be really honest with you, in my past I had thoughts about women covering their hair as being oppressed or with less value to be forced into covering. 

I’m really glad and blessed that my holy father allowed me to see that this is not the truth, yes sure there are women and girls being forced into covering but also women with strong faith and obedience to worship God only and not this world. 

When I started realizing that my heart is seeking information and truth about my own way covering or not covering, I started googleing it. Sure it is easy, and the main results showed Christian nuns, wearing head covering, or muslima’s headcover hijab. I continued searching the Scripture which leads me to 1. Corinthians 11:6 „For if a woman is not veiled, let her also have her hair cut short; but if it is shameful for a woman to wear her hair cut short or to have her head shaved, then let her be veiled.“ I know that this biblical verse is read and discussed a lot, pro head covering and against. I kept studying and searching for truths, reading about women in the time of Jesus, the way they were dressed, especially their hair. Jewish women used to wear tunics, with a sash or rope or a leather belt and they were covering their head and hair. 

I’m not living back then, or in Israel, still I felt my heart longing for more information, for more insights about their living and their fashion, well their clothes. As they were living in times were the clothing was also functional they used materials to comfort them in the different season weathers. Materials to keep their skin from burning through the sun, materials to keep them warm in cold night times. Still Gods word says

1. Timothy 2:9-10 „Likewise, the women, when they pray, should be dressed modestly and sensibly in respectable attire, not with elaborate hairstyles and gold jewelry, or pearls, or expensive clothes. Rather, they should adorn themselves with what is appropriate for women who claim to be worshipping God, namely, good deeds.“ 

It’s stated “when they pray, they should be dressed modestly..” I can only talk about myself but I like to pray during my day, starting in the early morning times when I wake up, standing up going to the bathroom, to the kitchen, to the childcare, the shoppingcentre, driving the car on the highway – everywhere. So after google supported me with all this informations I checked Pinterest and Instagram for some visual offers, which led me to beautiful Headcoverings called Tichel. Jewish headcover, and their technique to wrap them. At the time I started using a headcover myself, wrapping it around my head like the Jewish women on Wrapunzel. For me, headcovering is a visible obedience I give to God, while he is securing my thoughts. „Above all, be careful what you think because your thoughts control your life.“

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭4:23‬ 

The beginning was a challenge, not only the wrapping and the problem of slippery scarves, but also reactions and questions of people around me. More about the slippery Problem later. How about the different reactions in my surrounding.

  1. “May I ask, do you have cancer?” For some, it’s quiet a sensitive question, I do understand and respect this. One close relative of mine has cancer and she lost all her hair, beside the fight against cancer and all her therapy she has to fight the feeling to be unattractive or with less value because of her hairloss. Just about my decision to start wearing my tichel, I decided to donate my hair to a charity for children fighting cancer. The company is supported with hair and money donation and provides natural wigs for kids. It is such a beautiful work and I was really sad I didn’t know earlier in life, as I had many haircuts from hip long to really short always throwing away the hair. 
  2. “Did you convert to Islam?” This is a quiet interesting question, as it is mainly asked by European, let’s say German friends. It’s nothing negative or they didn’t meant any negativity, simply the fact I saw clearly, that for some people headcovering means “Islam”. Even Muslim women and men, talked to me in the city thinking I’m an arabic speaking Muslim. Well I’m working on the Arabic speaking point, but this will be another topic. As my family in Indonesia knew from the beginning that by the way I wrap the headscarf I can’t be Muslim. (Indonesia had a 87.2% population of Muslims in 2011)
  3. “Is this new fashion?” Yes, I also got these comments, if it’s just a fashion thing, because it’s nice for today, or because I got a “bad hair day”.
  4. “Is it because of religion or culture?” Well culture rather no, because the German culture does not cover hair any longer, long time ago they used to, while working on fields and to protect the hair and head from dust, dirt and sun, but I won’t say a normal hat is culture.. well “because of religion” this one is slightly tricky. I would say no. I don’t cover my hair because of religion, I posted 2 biblical verses which I needed for my journey to find out what is right for me only, on the path whether to wear a tichel or not, but it might be a total different meaning for my sister in Christ sitting next to me in church.

Honestly I had positiv respond to my new life-headstyle, because as soon as people in my surroundings realized that I do cover my head not because of a husband or a father or brother or a city or country or culture who told me to do so, I can see in their expression either interest and/or acceptance. I don’t care much about acceptance as I don’t harm anyone by wearing my tichel, it’s similar if I would wear a cap, or a sun hat or just a headband, it’s not offending anyone, and my main intention is to serve and obey God, not human, so my first thought is always, do I serve God, or people? Coming to the interest part, this one is more of a value for me. You may have read about refugees coming to Europe, Fear is a dangerous weapon and ignorance is an easy game for it. When the feeling and my interest in headcover began, it was months before the first refugees came. Today I know, covering my head is not only for myself and my relation to God, it is an instrument to fight ignorance and fear. To open eyes, to open topics without being scared, to open minds. Inside myself the feeling became bigger to clear things up, to show people that fear of the unknown is not necessary. Sure not everyone I met outside is asking me why I’m wearing the tichel, not everyone is asking if I’m sick or Muslim, or what kind of believe I’m actually in. But the few who already have or who will are exactly the ones who should and were led by the Heavenly Father! 

It’s been a year now, wearing a tichel when I leave the house. It’s not 100%, but I try at least 98%, sometimes my kids pull it off, or I just run outside quickly to check the mail or throw the rubbish. I’m looking forward to my upcoming tichel-year 2017.

Going back to the problem I mentioned earlier, the slipping problem. First when I decided to wear a headcover I tried different styles, sure you have a wide branch of how to do your hijab, and then I finally found some on how to do your tichel. I started to put my hair into a bun, then I tried the wrapping… and yeah it looked okay, but as soon as my head was moving my scarf started slipping too… I checked the internet, and found one woman telling to help yourself out with a baby cotton blanket, you usually use to wipe away things baby spilled, things baby grabbed and I used it to cover my baby while I was breastfeeding. I tried this method and it was working well. Okay, except I had this under my scarf and as soon as my kid pulled off my tichel it would come visible. So I tried different headbands I bought in shops nearby, but it didn’t work, then I tried to buy an undercap from a Turkish hijab shop, but I think they are not meant for Tichel or the turban hijab, just for hijab purpose. Then I found the Wrapunzel Homepage with lots of beautiful scarves, pins, and tutorials!! I bought my Volumnizer and I’m so happy about it! Right now I’m using scarves I already owned or I got some from my sisters in Christ and friends and family to start with – but as mentioned before, the scarves and kits at Wrapunzel are so beautiful, think my next order will be made soon! And with this volumnizer I can even wear my tichel with short hair, while it looks as if I still have my long hair under the scarf. The volumnizer creates a nice and beautiful shape as well and it’s easy to wrap your scarf around. And the most important point for me – it’s a non-slip-band included!

After this problem was fixed I started to work on different wrapping methods and styles and still am learning and working on new looks. 

So I’m not at the end of my story why I start wearing a headcover, what thoughts and fears I went through. I thank you for taking the time to read my tichel story. Always feel free to comment below. God bless you!