Living with less

Some weeks ago my sister in Christ showed me a documentary about American Amish, because I was and am thinking about a Christian modest and simple lifestyle.
While I was watching the 6 series on Youtube I was talking to God, reading his Bible and thinking about how to start changing my own life and lifestyle.

Last year I already started to declutter and to think about what to sort out for good, I did every room after another, and it is a circle returning after months. So, I started with the kids room, the bedroom – all the closets and then the livingroom and kitchen, when I returned doing everything all over again, when my family and I moved last year, and still there is so much stuff – I told my sister it’s like a black hole and we are not getting less it seems that we keep all the stuff while I’m throwing more things out.
So what is it again that’s too much? When I take a look at my kids rooms I find too many toys and games (even I sorted out more than the half of it) and again I’m decluttering their rooms.

Last time I donated a lot of kitchen stuff like plates, cutlery, bowls and cups.
And still it seems like I have no room for my left over plates and pans, I try to minimize everything to a minimal point, just enough for the family.
So what got my attention while watching the documentary?
There were several points, starting with finding my position and purpose as a mother and housewife, how to find a new point of view of my life, my person and my position at home. In my past, especially during school and study time I was thinking I’m independent and have to be well educated and on the same position as men; I don’t say education is bad or there is no need in education for girls/women – in fact I still think it is good and necessary to give both, men and women the chance and availability to study.
I’m just talking about my own story and history – as I’m grown up in a family with 2 sisters and my parents wished that we should all finish our High School graduation – so we did, and I enrolled university to study, while to be honest I didn’t know what to study. I took a course called “Asian science” and started learning to speak the Malaysian/indonesian language and some history, cultural and religious information.
After 2 years study I finally stopped and started my training at a big firm as an office clerk, and worked there for about 3 years.

Looking back at these times I can tell it was good, maybe also necessary, but also a journey of my own, searching for my own place, my own self.
Why? Today I know that my heart wished for something else than high quality education, since I was 16 and in High School I was planing to be a wife, a mother and first place a daughter of the highest. While my life turned out to be a journey with different stops and dead end roads; yes I am happy and thankful to be able to go to school and to study at university and choose my own job, so I can become independent – but do I need it? God has the right partner for me as well as for you, I knew that before, when I was at school, but still there need to be a kind of emergency plan or else.
When I look around my self, my family and friends, I see the uncertainty on their faces and minds when it comes to future plans or even a so called 5-year-future plan. Some of my friends are still not sure about whether they should marry their partner whom they already live with in a unit for years now or not and stay in this position and life circumstance for some more years.
I walked this path already, I lived with my partner for years, not married to each other like so many nowadays and then became pregnant – this changed everything, my point of view, my wish of the right path, the one God has planned for me. While my partner was far away from God’s path, I wished for the partner God has already created for me, the kind of caring and loving partner, that loves God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit and where both partners listen to God’s plan and his marriage order in life.
Finally I’m able to see and understand God’s order and this documentary about the Amish showed another way of modest and good way of God, I liked the part of “having less but having more” – I mean, having less electronic and especially the internet including smartphones and other distraction but instead of having all these distractions you’ll have so much more life value.
I experienced this one last year where I broke my iPhone while I was on my way to the family holiday and finally when it broke I felt relieved being away from the force to have this phone in hand to check everything possible, like messages, calls, news, the weather, social media etc.the list continues…
I enjoyed these 3 weeks, full of family and no smartphone, sure reality returned back the week I’ve been home again – but this experience and some more thinking about Amish lifestyle led me to the point where I am currently.
I’m not saying to leave out everything I’m used to be and start a life in the wild or as an Amish or hutterer but to value everything we have that we already forgot to be grateful for, like for example electricity, running water and of course grocery stores etc. I guess it is really a complete different life, going back to live like 150 years ago.

What is my conclusion or decision after finish watching the documentary of the Amish lifestyle? Well I can’t change within a short time period, but I can start. Living a life like the Amish here where my family and I live is a bit more complicated, starting with the clothes and the community, if your church community and all of your siblings in Christ are living approximately 30-50km away from you, it is difficult to reach your siblings without a car – and I haven’t seen many riding a horse, well I was thinking about riding the bike instead of buying a horse.

I like the simple and modest life of the Amish, their love to the father and their freedom of loving their life as God has given it to them, so do I. I love the life and the chances God has given me, the situations and possibilities I experienced and the people I’ve met, still I’m looking forward to my simple life.
I will keep you updated!

Be blessed!

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Inviting Jesus

It is Good Friday, and while I was thinking about how to leave out the bunny and focus on the Lamb – Jesus I was and am confronted with commercial, family traditions and unbelieving friends having this look and even the question of you’re really serious!

It is one thing to leave out the easter tradition made out of human, while you are single but for me, as a mother it is another thing to explain and educate the kids why everyone is celebrating the easter bunny instead of remembering Jesus and his precious gift he gave us. Years ago I was looking forward celebrating those traditions like easter with painted eggs, Christmas and all the lamps and decorations, while the last ones I was thinking how to combine the truth and history with the decoration – for this time I started to read the story where Jesus took the last supper with his disciples and was then betrayed and left, while the kids where drawing some pictures. Then I prepared some eggs and some boiled ones to be painted as well. I can tell, it is easy to explain to my family, but it is something different to shut out the world, and their questioning views. I’m still on my way finding peace in how to simply explain to friends, family and others outside why we are not celebrating an Easter bunny or a fat man named Santa.

As the weather is so spring-like nice today, I just took the kids out on a bicycle tour to several playgrounds.
After this we went back home and prepared some meal to finally have our time cuddling on the couch (I really love this time!) the movie we are going to watch is “Narnia” (first part).

Coming back to the topic – inviting Jesus. For me it is important to invite him to everything, every situation in my life, he is my everything and everything in my life is his. So while I enjoy my time with the family he is with us always, I can talk to him, ask him for directions and he is there for me leading and directing me throughout my day. Sometimes I see my children pray to God, asking him daily things and I just see and immediately know this is the right way and as it is said in the bible I try to become more like my children when praying/talking to my Heavenly Father!

Be blessed!

Difficulties

The Difficulties I experienced and still experience wearing a headcover – no matter if it’s my Tichel or a Hijab or Veil is still in the air.

Even posting pictures on Instagram (@Sarah_Jesus_Headcover) creates questions, questionmarks inside some heads and well sometimes misunderstanding. But I really appreciate all my followers and followers-to-be who simply write a message or post a comment below and ask whatever is on their mind.
Sometimes it’s even easier to talk to others on these online platforms as in real life.
Why is that? Well let me explain, in real daily life, walking with a tichel or any kind of headcover as a Christian creates these questionmarks on people’s face. I can’t even tell why, but I experienced that sometimes people want to ask, and sometimes they don’t. If they don’t, they’d like to keep their own explanation, even if they are totally “wrong” or “misled”. While on others it’s like this disgusting look, because I stopped wearing my tichel the second half of 2017 and started again in 2018. And it feels like a facial expression telling me “come on, you’ve already had this period and let’s call it phase of your life, than finally you stopped and got back to normal and now again? Why’s that, I hoped and wished that you’ve passed it now and forever”… this is a lot, for just an expression – but well, I don’t know why, but too often it’s that I’m right about such things. It’s like a “feeling” or something like this.

Last time I had a good talk to my sister, while I don’t know if she understood what I tried to explain to her or not, because as I know myself years ago I was similar, thinking “why should God want us to cover our hair? He created us like this” yes, totally right, it has nothing to do with our naturally appearance but more about obedience for our heavenly father Adonai. Our culture, the media and well social acceptance created a point of view in my sight that kept telling me to take my right as a woman wearing what I want, if I want to be sexy I wear even less clothes, because I can. Well, yes because I can, doesn’t mean it’s the right way.

“Submit as people who are free, but not letting your freedom serve as an excuse for evil; rather, submit as God’s slaves. Be respectful to all — keep loving the brotherhood, fearing God and honoring the emperor.”
1 Pe 2:16‭-‬17 CJB

The most experience while wearing my tichel is a surprised facial expression and sometimes question about my believe, if I converted, if I’m Muslim, if I changed something important in my life – and if so what exactly?! Some asked, if I cover because of sickness, if I lost my hair and cover because of cancer or leukemia.
And still, on Instagram I’m asked if I’m Muslim even I’m posting christian and biblical quotes – I’m not offended or anything at all, it’s always a pleasure to get in touch and in good talk to people interested in “why I cover”. When I started last year it was a challenge for myself, but also a way to let others know and inform why others cover and the most important thing to stop a limited mind thinking about headcover is for muslimas only.
It is still a way to go and not as easy as it could be, because the first impression is still something different. But as long as people ask and show interest, there is hope to spread truth.

When I met Jesus and when he took place in my heart, I wanted to know him more, become more like him, like my heavenly father sees me, he has created me as a whole, perfect person and I want to show this, and thank him by gifting him my whole life and everything I am and everything I do.

I can pray in my home, in my room; same as praying in my church community – but I also pray and talk to God while I’m outside, walking in the park or forest.
Last year I read a bit of “stop being a people-pleaser” by Joyce Meyer and this is what I still try to practice in full. Sometimes it is easy, sometimes it is a bit more difficult.
Especially right now in the cold winter season, I’m wearing normal hats/beanies besides my tichel headcovering.

Well, well.. I will keep you updated with my headcover post and the year 2018!

Be blessed!

Christian Head-Covering Tag

It is time to start this blog post, to let you know some more facts and to let you know more about my ways wearing a headcover as a Jesus following christian.

A dear blog follower introduced me to this christian head covering tag and I think it is really a good idea to write down some facts about me and my story on wearing a headcover a jewish tichel.

• How old are you?
I’m 33 years old.

• For how long are you covering?
I started covering last year, 2017 in spring, after I donated my hair.

• How do you cover?
I cover all of my hair; after I tried to cover parts of my hair, like some leaving a fringe, but with my head and hair it didn’t work.
After I started covering my head I started thinking and wearing more modest clothes. I cover my legs and I sorted out tops, shirts and sweater showing too much of chest and chestbones.

• Why do you cover?
I’m born into a protestant christian family, no one is wearing a headcover, whether in church, nor outside.
As a half Indonesian with many visits in this beautiful country I got in contact with hijab wearing women, as Indonesia is the biggest country with Muslim people, 88% of the Indonesians are Muslim (about 191 Mio.people).

Some years ago I started to question myself why some women cover, and the first impression and thought was because of a rule, or a husband, a tradition or a country who tells women to do so. I did some research about the different ways and styles of headcover and their different expression and intention, I began to pray and asked God about my way, my purpose and what I still need to know about headcovering.

I read 1 Cor 11
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is the Messiah, and the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of the Messiah is God. Every man who prays or prophesies wearing something down over his head brings shame to his head, but every woman who prays or prophesies with her head unveiled brings shame to her head — there is no difference between her and a woman who has had her head shaved. For if a woman is not veiled, let her also have her hair cut short; but if it is shameful for a woman to wear her hair cut short or to have her head shaved, then let her be veiled.
1 Co 11:3‭-‬6 CJB

And I started to re-think about the way the western woman is clothing herself and why we think it is a freedom and gift to wear less clothes as a woman. I took a deeper look at the social advertisement, the media and the education.
It is said that women shouldn’t be bound to her wearing, her clothes and her appearance – I think this is correct, but when you start changing the point of view into a neutral point, where you start seeing yourself as a perfect creation God has made, it is a fast way to a more modest way of clothing and behavior.
For me it got clearer every day, as my mind knew, I don’t have to show more flesh and body parts of myself to the world just to be accepted, to be recognized, to be someone.
I just want to be me, the “me” God has created in my mother’s womb 33 years ago.
As a sign of honor and reverence I started covering my hair during prayer at home, which quickly extended, as I questioned myself, what I should do outside, while I’m at the mall, or grocery or at the zoo or elsewhere when I am praying unplanned.
This is how and why I started covering in the first place.

• Do you cover for the same reason now and in the beginning?
The reason I covered in the beginning is still the same now, while today I have to answer even more questions about covering than before. I moved 6 months ago and while moving I didn’t cover my head and now I started again.

•In front of whom do you stay covered? Are there exceptions (family gatherings, working place..)?
At the moment I cover my head in church and on some activities of the kids. I don’t wear my headcover at home or while family gatherings, usually I take off my headcover while visiting female friends and wrap my “tichel” back on when going home.

• What was the reaction of your husband? Of other family members? Of persons you meet?
The reactions were differently, my sisters reacted distant, so did my mother, while my father knows that biblically and in old traditionally christian communities it is nothing new or uncommon to see head covered women in church.
The other family members didn’t asked much, I don’t know if this was because of no interest or fear to ask an embarrassing question.
When I first cover, I met many people outside guessing I’m Arab and Muslim, while I think my appearance is clearly Asian, I could friendly tell that I’m German, while half Asian and no, I’m not a muslima but Jesus following Christian.
For some the next question was, why I cover then, if it is normal for a Christian or not and as soon as we got in a conversation it was a positive exchange of this topic “head cover”.

• How did covering change your life? (prayer, self-esteem, testifying…)
The cover was a shield, like a helmet and a crown. I decided to cover for God, not because my husband has told me, or my father or my church community, but because my heart told me to listen to my heavenly father and obey his rules, and not to look to other people’s opinions, or
conviction.

• your denomination?
I am following Jesus Christ, the living Word of God, ADONAI my heavenly father and his Ruach HaKodesh – Holy Spirit – christian.

I thank you for reading my new blogpost, please leave a comment below. Be blessed! Shalom

Walking with Jesus

It is still fresh in the beginning of 2018, and while I’m just back on my way of wearing the beautiful tichel, many thoughts are crossing my mind.
Like the small border to cross every day, choosing the scarf and putting away the fear and thoughts about what others might think seeing me, wearing my headscarf.
Like today I had to walk into district court, where they check really strict and well, at first I received all the looks, but after I walked with faith and Jesus quickly their facial expressions changed, without telling a word.
While the first thought was, what do they think, or what do they have in mind about me; I simply pushed these thoughts away and walked in faith.


To all you tichel, headcover, hijab wearing women, what reaction, questions and comments were you dealing with, when you started to wear your headcover?
I know for some religious reasons, women who once decide to wear the headcover they have to stick to it and continue wearing it daily, for example jewish married women, cover their hair daily and constant; and Muslim women continue wearing hijab, niqab or burka when they choose and decide to wear it. While I recently met one old friend who changed from hijab wearing for over 14 years to non-hijab. I haven’t had the chance and time to meet her yet and to have a talk about the circumstances, her story about choosing to stop wearing hijab.

I guess you too have had or still have these situations where you get these looks or questions about your headcover. How do you handle these? Maybe you can share your way of starting to wear your headcover in a comment?

Be blessed!

Day 8

It’s January 8th and this day is the day where I finally got back on my way of full obedience and trust in the Lord.

Why is that?

In 2017 I was first wearing my Tichel, starting in the first quarter of the year. This was first not daily or regular, but mostly on some events, where I met friends or went to sport activities of my kids.
It was something complete new, because besides my Muslim friends there were no other women wearing these special kind of headcover.
Before I finally decided to wear a Tichel I was reading a lot, praying a lot and again reading and surfing the internet.
The first and main question I had was “are there other christian woman wearing a headcover (besides the nun), especially a headcover similar to the hijab and/or tichel?”
And I found some blogposts and pinterest pins where I continued reading and growing my interest and wish to finally obey God’s call for myself.

When I first decided to wear my headcover, I had many friends and some far relatives living close by, so there was a necessarily to explain what exactly I was doing, also my christian community – while I knew, my christian family would understand, accept and of course welcome my wish to cover my hair/head.
While I already posted some of my experiences I had wearing my Tichel back in 2017 but by the end of 2017 in September I slowly stopped wearing my Tichel. I went to my hairdresser and then I stopped wrapping my head.
It was okay for the first month, like a rebellion feeling alright with the things she’s doing, and even it is not a big deal to cover or not to cover for some, for me it was.

In my family there is no one wrapping/covering their hair, so it was more unusual for me, to cover as a Christian.
And yes it was a challenge and an act of strength to stay strong with my believe why I’m covering with all the questions and arguments you get to hear, while right now, looking back on all these situations I can smile and think, I shouldn’t have tried to do it all by myself, as it is simply God’s request towards me, not anyone else’s, but just me; so that’s the main reason. Where it comes from or why women do, this are good questions too, but for all the unasked questions that I saw in some people’s eyes I can happily suggest “Google”.

While here on my blog I will tell you all my ways and steps and thoughts of why and how I finally found back to wrapping again.

The last month’s of 2017 while I still wasn’t covering my hair I somehow had this every now and then feeling to take some looks on pinterest or instagram were I follow tichel and hijab styles, as well as I continue studying the scripture and exchanging thoughts and bible quotes with my siblings at church, I quickly knew, that my short absence of not wearing my Tichel was temporarily.

Once a friend told me “only the naughty wife’s should wear a headcovering, we are free through Jesus Christ” and I canagree to that – we are free through our saviour Jesus but to cover my hair doesn’t mean, I’m following some rules I read in the bible and which rules for every women believing in Christ. For me covering my hair means obeying God in my home, my heart but also in public. I put this headcovering border between me, my head and this earth, to show where and especially to whom I belong.

For some women the only impression of headcover is the Muslim women wearing a hijab, and the image of these being oppressed or even been forced to wear a hijab or niqab or else. I’m not saying there aren’t suc situations, but headcovering women aren’t labelled being Muslim. Headcovering Christians and Jews are covering their head as well as our Muslim sisters do, but sadly in our time and our culture the devil knows how to implement fear and lies in things like headcovering. History shows that even 50 years ago women were wearing headcoverings religious and non-religious. When I first decided to wear my tichel I found out there’s is a lot to improve with information and to stop fear and especially intolerance in our western countries. It is important to have thirsty willing Christians instead of sleeping uninformed Christians who only knows Christmas is where Santa is coming and Easter means the Easter bunny hides the eggs.

In December 2017 I already posted my thoughts about headcover tichel and hijab but today, there is this one particular thought in my head “whom do you obey? Who is more important to you, the desires and thoughts of the other people around you, or my thoughts – from my heavenly father the almighty ADONAI!

Again I want to make clear, this post is about me and my experience about my way of a non-headcovering-christian to a headcovering-christian, and not a pointing finger at a biblical quote that hair covering is a rule for every woman. In my opinion it is something personal between you and ADONAI, there has to be something really deep meaning for you, a wish, a heart desire, a wish to obey and to give glory to God by doing whatever you may do and in this case to cover your hair. If you may feel similar this might be a good blog post to read and get to know why I started, paused and get back to wearing my Tichel in 2018. This was, what I exactly felt, I was used to not-cover, as I was not covering my head for 32 years and then I just started to wear the Tichel in 2017, sure I felt it was right for me, and it felt familiar in some case; but I willfully decided to stop wearing it and in the end, my spirit led me to the knowledge what is right for me and what is not.

So in December 2017 I already knew that covering my hair is right for me, is good for me, is simply me – but still I didn’t cover my hair. What kept me from doing this? Fear. Prejudice. To be biased. Bad talk. Lack of understanding.

You know where this led me? I finally found out, that I was again at one point of my life, where I’ve already have been – the people-pleaser passage. I understood, that I was thinking too much about the others, what would the other think, if I cover my hair, if I return covering, the gossip which may occur, the thoughts, so what was I thinking I could stop these thoughts about me by simply going back into the line, trying to be as invisible and similar as the others, following people’s rules in their town/city etc.? I’m not saying or stating, that I’m disobeying the rules of my city or my country but simply showing you my main focus and fear was pointing on something completely different than I wanted it to be. My spirit told me to focus on the Lord, my Abba. I knew that I should look at Jesus only and forget about the bad talks or any talks of the people around me.

And today, after I had a talk with my sister in Christ on the phone, I told her that I’m thinking to go back wearing my Tichel, but that I’m still calculating about how to cross my border that I’ve build and raised myself.
After we ended our talk on the phone it was like no more thinking about these issues at all, I knew that my soul with all its fears of gossip and talking from others, should subjugate the spirits leading and this is what finally happened. I didn’t thought about what may be, the talk, the looks, the thoughts – because this is something I can’t turn off – what I am able to decide is, what I am doing, whom I will follow and most important whom I will trust, obey and love!

Today is the first day of covering again, I already received incomprehensible looks, answered two of other mothers from school about my haircovering – and I can tell you, by wearing my Tichel I have way more nice discussions about christianity and my love and savior Jesus than without.


With this I send you God’s blessing and a big thank you for reading my blog. I will be back soon with more. Shalom

So God will

Oh his eyes, when he looked at me for the first time, we both knew we were meant to be together. I was out the house to get some water, when I met him. He was kind and nice and I knew that my creator who knows everything and especially my little heart.
This man came to my father’s house and introduced himself, later they arranged our wedding and our happiness couldn’t be greater.


My love helped and worked for my family for 7 years and after this the wedding was planned. I wasn’t my families first daughter and my older sister wasn’t married yet, so my father decided something I was really sad about, at the day of my wedding, he told my sister to wear my wedding dress and beautiful scarf. My love couldn’t see whom he’d married, and after the first night he found out and was angry about this betrayal, he confronted my father and asked him to marry me still, even if he would have to work for my family another 7 years.


My father accepted, because while my husband was working for him he made a lot income, his belongings, his farm animals and money grew bigger because of my husbands work. Surely he wanted him to stay, and especially because he married both of his daughters and after my sister gave birth to his grandchildren he wanted to keep his whole family together.
But my husband decided to leave and start his own family and business far away from my father. He gave him enough of his farm animals and so we packed everything we owned and took our animals to start our journey to our own land.

My sister was blessed with many children, but with me, I stayed without children, while I knew that my husband loved me more – we had true love, but because he made a promise to keep my sister as his wife and to take care of her and their children he followed God’s rules and obeyed.
I felt heartbroken, because even I knew he loved me so much, still we couldn’t have our own children. I had this deeply wish to give birth to our son, a God given child of love. I prayed, every day of several years, while my sister continued giving birth.

Then finally God heard my prayer and released me by gifting me my first son – Joseph.


– Rahel, wife of Jacob –